January 22, 2014
Sometimes when I am fresh out of bed, whether it be from a nap or a full night’s sleep, I attempt to be productive too soon. I will aimlessly stumble around straightening or organizing with no real purpose. It’s happened more than once that people who have the misfortune of seeing me in this moment of slight insanity look at me bewildered and ask what I’m doing. I’m not entirely sure why this has become a pattern but I suspect it is due to my desire to be an alert, fully functioning human being before my brain and body are ready. (I’m beginning to recognize that I need to learn how to take my own advice – see here.)
Yesterday I spent the afternoon/evening away from my apartment, and when I finally arrived home at 10:45pm, I realized that I obviously had not been thinking clearly that morning because nearly everything I had touched before noon was in the strangest location or missing – my water bottle, my phone charger, my journal, my make up brushes, a gold animal figurine that sits on my vanity (I mean, really? What was I even doing?). I would like to blame it on the fact that I got very little sleep the night before, but I know myself better than to use that excuse.
Now fast forward seven or so hours and I’m at hot yoga, palms planted on my mat, knees bent in downward dog, ready to spring forward into a halfway lift, and I had the best “yes!” moment. A handful of thoughts that had been floating around in my head most of the day fell into place during that second of emptiness and tension between the end of an exhale and the beginning of the following inhale. I’m currently working on putting this humble epiphany into words so I can share it with you … though I’m still unsure whether or not it’ll make it beyond bullet points.
But while writing this blog post I just had the following realization … an analogy within an analogy, if you will. (man, I’m full of it today. somebody stop me.) I’ve found that I thrive on these impactful moments of clarity. This one in particular served as a reminder that no matter where I find myself, whether it be haphazardly re-arranging my surroundings, experiencing a discouraging sense of wandering, or acting unintentionally and recklessly, there is always a moment coming when the fog will lift … and for me, it often comes in other’s writing (I’ve been devouring Richard Siken quotes this morning). It’s on my yoga mat. It’s in coffee and conversation. It’s in alone time.
That was my yesterday. And this is what I wore. Confession: these photos were taken twice. I lost the memory card that contained the first set. My scatterbrain is so painfully obvious in this post. Sheesh.
Hat: Gap (Similar.)
Coat. J.Crew (Save. Spend. Splurge *all options under $200!)
Sweater: c/o Jigsaw (Save. Spend. Splurge.)
Pendant: LuluBug Jewelry (Save. Spend. Splurge.)
Jeans: Gap (Save. Spend. Splurge.)
Shoes: Abound via Nordstrom Rack (Save. Spend. Splurge.)
Wrapped away from my face around a 2″ curling iron.
Photos by Kai. (Both times. Sorry, Kai.)